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How I came to this work (the longer version)

Several years back, as I was leading a content meeting at a high stress media job, I had a seizure. Totally out of the blue I started feeling shaky and without warning my body gave out. I crumbled to the floor and shocking jolts of energy ripped through my body. I was totally conscious of it all, but not in control.

More seizures followed in the weeks to come. These ranged in severity from a sudden inability to speak or do simple things like tie my shoe to full-on seizures that felt like huge energy waves thrashing muscles and bones. It was like my brain and my body were totally short-circuiting. Sometimes I had the experience of being outside my body looking down at myself writhing on the floor.

With this, I had to stop riding my bike, going on hikes and walks, and driving altogether. These  episodes could last for several minutes to more than an hour. Afterwards, I was completely exhausted. I sought out numerous specialists, underwent MRIs and EEGs, spent several days in a hospital simply so they could monitor me. It was not epilepsy, I had no abnormal brain activity. I went to every medical center in my city (which is filled with world-class medical centers). No one could explain what was going on, or why.  The unknown of it all was absolutely terrifying.
 
A life-changing message

One night, in a sea of despair and exhaustion, I sat in my bathtub until the water got cold and broke down, crying out loud for help. As I heard my voice reverberating off the bathroom walls a single word popped in to my head: Forgiveness. I had no idea what to do with that message, so I did what any modern girl does--I got out of the bath, dried off, and Googled "Forgiveness" followed by the name of the city I lived in. The first or second entry in search results was a blog post on Forgiveness by an energy healer and empathic spiritual teacher who literally lived only a few blocks away.

There is more to the story, but suffice it to say divine intervention led me a wonderful healer and mentor, and to the modalities of energy healing, energy mastery, and spiritual counseling. This person ultimately inspired me do what I do now to help others.

What I learned right away is that the undercurrent of anxiety that I'd been dealing with my whole life (and I had totally normalized) had finally worn my body down. Stress had built upon stress and deep down anxiety from the past that had not been properly tended to, and it was all way more toxic than I'd imagined. I was literally short-circuiting. My mind and body were tightly wired and programmed for running stress and anxiety. I could get relief from a good run, a hot bath, a group meditation but it was only temporary. Since I'd stopped many overtly self-destructive/coping behaviors I'd convinced myself that feeling anxious and an occasional panic attack was fine. Truth is, as a child and up to that point, I was always on high alert, at the ready to do whatever it took to try and prevent or remedy unpredictable, potentially volatile situations. That state was so normal for me that I didn't even realize how deeply I was run by fear and "shoulds" and what I perceived I needed to do to keep everything smooth and other people happy. Even though I'd recovered a lot, the rigidness and discipline I had around my daily life, including self-care kept me from tending to the root causes and kept my deepest trauma at bay enough to function--at least until it all just didn't work anymore.
 
You are a more powerful than you've been led to believe

As I immersed myself in sessions with my mentor, I was determined to learn all I could about energy systems, about how the mind and energy work together, about the complex world of emotions. This led me into consciousness research and the work of Robert Monroe and I have been fortunate to take classes and training at the Monroe Institute. I won't get into the mechanics of it all, but as but the seizures subsided. My energy levels became more balanced and grounded. My heightened levels of sensitivity calmed down and I was able to clearly "see" and know what was mine to tend to and what was not. I started noticing some strange-to-me feelings: consistent serenity, focus, and a sense of truly belonging in the world. Comfortable in my skin. My intuition and ability to "read" energy became razor sharp and I soon found that the combination of modalities I was working with were really effective in quickly resolving numerous other issues quite rapidly. For me, much faster than talk therapy alone. The thread in everything is energy, something most people don't pay attention too even though public conversations about it are far more ubiquitous now than they were when I was so sick.

Over time, I've also successfully helped hundreds of clients and students heal on the deepest levels to step into greater authenticity and well-being. For some of them this has led to physical changes including weight loss, releasing addiction, and pain management. My learning in this (and everything else) is ever-ongoing, but what I know for sure is that you are more powerful that you've been lead to believe and have access to information, abilities, and resources you may not fully realize. I can help you tap in and learn to work with energy to heal and support the transformation of what's no longer working for you into that which serves your highest and best good. The work we do will always be guided and measured by how you feel and the real-world things you want to do and actualize. The greater beauty of this is that as you heal yourself it can also impact your loved ones, your friends, colleagues, your community in positive ways.

Forgiveness = releasing and letting go

There was a lot that happened in my life that was not optimal--and things I did in my anxious confusion and pain that were not great for anyone. As I healed I could  see it all clearly and discern where my forgiveness of others (as well as making amends with those I'd hurt) was needed and appropriate. I also came to a place of total forgiveness of myself. My biggest learning was understanding that the deeper meaning-action-and energy of forgiveness is ultimately being able to release all of it and receive the gift of being in present time--where none of it had to impact my life anymore. My experience is that most people don't live in present time. We're driven by the subconscious messages from the past and our worries about the future. We live in our heads and neglect the energy messages our body sends to us. In presence we are in our full clarity and power. In presence we can clearly focus our energy on creating what is right and true for ourselves, our families, our future.

The most powerful, radical thing you can do

This is why deeper healing is so important. This is why I fully believe that mastering one's mind and our energy changes everything. In fact, I believe it is one of the most powerful and radical things we can do. I am no longer anxious in fact most people comment on how calm and clear I am. This does not mean my emotions are eradicated. On the contrary, they are more honest and pure because I am totally present to them and not muddled by the need to control them or any undercurrent of anxiety, triggers of past hurt, unhelpful thoughts, the need to control things, undermining beliefs or crippling judgement. As such, they move through me quickly allowing me to return to a default of calm and clarity--a clear, more powerful place where I can "see" the deeper reasons for things, understand the nuances, solve problems from the view of objective observer, and never take the negative behavior of others personally. I am the director of how my thoughts and energy are put to use, not the other way around. This helps in me in every aspect of life from the different kinds of work I do, to relationships, good health, and wealth in all its forms. It's what I help other people do too.

There's much more to my story and of course it is ongoing.  If anything here resonates with you please book a call to learn more about this work. I'd love to get to know you and if you feel I can be helpful, let's schedule a session. I look forward to speaking with you!